For the past couple of days I have been itching to get back here and write my thoughts. Each time I would think "I just need a few minutes of quiet to be able to process my thoughts." I have the quiet now, but I think my processor may be down.
It is just one of those weeks. Usually the kids and I spend our time pretty quietly at home. That works well for me. My husband proudly refers to me as antisocial---I think he's just making the point that opposites attract, but he does know me pretty well. While I can hold my own with people, it is sooo much easier to let my gregarious, charming husband take care of the day to day PR. Since he is usually gone Monday through Friday, I have to occassionally step out in the light of day myself. This week is one of those.
Doctor's appointments. I dread them more than, well, just about anything. People who know me are sometimes surprised by that, considering I am a nurse. That is actually a large part of the reason. I have very little patience for inefficiency, rudeness and most of all the tramping all over of parental rights that routinely goes on in the doctors' offices. Since moving to TN we have spent more than our allotted Dr. visits for sickness and injuries. Now I am taking the plunge and starting the well-child visits. Yeah.
Right now I am praying, seriously praying, that the doctor the kids see will be one that respects parents' rights, that has an open mind about home-schooling and that appreciates family values. A doctor like that could possibly change my mind about taking my kids for physicals.
Unfortunately, many times physicians and others make people feel that to be a good parent they must agree and follow all suggestions by those medical personnel. While I respect the knowledge that they have, I have to remember that I know my children and will make decisions based on what is best for them and for our family. As a nurse, I worked to protect and stand up for the rights of my patients. I will do no less for my children.
Knowing the potential for stress, I will definitely need to take a few minutes with a cup of coffee and some prayer. The Lord knows my fears and my weaknesses, but He also knows the love I have for my children. Its hard to believe that He feels that way about me. And He loves my kids more than I can even fathom. With that in mind, I can go do this, and look forward to that cup of coffee that I am going to reward myself with when its over.